Haircuts, Hens, and Homicide
by Stephanie Dagg
Megan finds mayhem when she arrives in France to bury her Gran and sort out her affairs. She expected difficult encounters with civil servants and red tape but not with wandering chickens, an imperious policeman, and a dead body. Together with her unlikely new friend, the elderly and grumpy Alphonse and his canine equivalent, Monsieur Moustache, Megan becomes involved in investigating the fowl-related foul play that’s at work in this sleepy part of rural France.
She’s helped but mainly hindered by the people she comes across. These include the local mayor, who wants Megan to stay and set up a hair salon in his village to help keep it alive. There are the cousins Romain, the gendarme, and Nico, the clumsy but hunky farmer. They have always clashed, but do so constantly now that Megan is on the scene. Michelle, Romain’s terrifying ex who wants him back, appears along the way, as does Claudette, a wheelchair-bound old lady, and Kayla, Megan’s best friend, who is hugely pregnant but not above taking on the forces of French law and order when Megan finds herself the prime suspect after Alphonse is stabbed.
There’s excitement, humor and lots of ruffled feathers in this rom-com slash cozy mystery, the first in a projected series.
Favorite Quotes:
The first time I'd visited Gran in France I'd expected to see the entire male population wearing berets. My school textbooks had been resolute on the matter.
I didn't know French women cried. I thought they only had one emotional setting: ferocity. Mind you, looking back I'd always been in Gran's company when I'd met any French women and she had the knack of bringing that quality out in everyone.
There were a good few words I'd never heard before. I made a mental note to look them up later. You could never have too many swear words at your disposal in any language.
I'd become a good judge of what people were saying without actually listening. I mean, there's only so many long rambling tales of child prodigies, cute cats and cheating boyfriends you can listen to without wanting to stick your scissors in your eye.
"I've always been attracted to older men," Claudette went on, "so each of my men was twenty years old than me. Hans was ninety-four when we shacked up." I fought desperately to keep my face blank, but 'ninety-four' and 'shacked up' are so not words you expect to hear in the same sentence. "I finished him off in four years," was Claudette's next deadpan remark.
Jason had been a slim guy so didn't slim just represent the first four letters of slimy, after all?
Now for all I knew, my father might own a string of racehorses or a fleet of oil tankers or even a small Caribbean island, maybe several. Nah, it was far more likely he owned a beer belly, a clapped-out car and a pile of debt.
My Review:
This wittily amusing book was a delight from start to finish. Ms. Dagg’s writing sparkled with more twinkles than my friend Nikki’s disco ball. The lively storylines were cleverly crafted and just so much fun. I adored all the quirky and colorful characters, vibrantly detailed and glee-inducing escapades, the nimbly plotted chicken napping murder mysteries, and hilarious inner musings and insightful observations of the main character of Megan.
After the humorously whimsical Megan, my second favorite character was Nico, who despite his appeal and sweet nature, was a walking hazard and unwittingly wrought destruction and injury to any unfortunate object, person, or creature within his reach. The storylines were laced with all manner of clever little tidbits and lovable antics such as Catastrophe - the “little scabby tabby;” the duck that thought she was a chicken and avoided the duck pond; and the ancient kleptomaniac chicken expert Megan privately labeled “Chikipedia” and his ugly dog with the precious name of Monsieur Moustache. The hardest part of writing this review was winnowing down the many pages of mirthfully rib-tickling favorite quotes I had marked. This was my first exposure to Ms. Dagg’s deft literary artistry and it left me with a greedy want of all her clever words.
Empress DJ
Author Bio –
I'm an English expat living in France, having moved here with my family in 2006 after fourteen years as an expat in Ireland. I now consider myself a European rather than 'belonging' to any particular country. The last ten years have been interesting, to put it mildly. Taking on seventy-five acres with three lakes, two hovels and one cathedral-sized barn, not to mention an ever-increasing menagerie, makes for exciting times. The current array of animals includes alpacas, llamas, huarizos (alpaca-llama crossbreds, unintended in our case and all of them thanks to one very determined alpaca male), sheep, goats, pigs, ducks, geese, chickens and turkeys, not forgetting our pets of dogs, cats, zebra finches, budgies , canaries, lovebirds and Chinese quail. Before we came to France all we had was a dog and two chickens, so it's been a steep learning curve. I recount these experiences in my book Heads Above Water: Staying Afloat in France and the sequel to that, Total Immersion: Ten Years in France. I also blog regularly at www.bloginfrance.com.
I'm married to Chris and we have three bilingual TCKs (third culture kids) who are resilient and resourceful and generally wonderful.
I'm a traditionally-published author of many children's books and am now self-publishing too. I have worked part-time as a freelance editor for thirty years after starting out as a desk editor for Hodder & Stoughton. Find me at www.editing.zone. The rest of the time I'm running carp fishing lakes with Chris and inevitably cleaning up some or other animal's poop.
Social Media Links – @llamamum
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