Monday, March 31, 2014

Giveaway & Book Blitz: The Opposite of Nothing - Shari Slade


The Opposite of Nothing by Shari Slade
Publication date: March 31st 2014
Genres: Contemporary, New Adult, Romance

Synopsis:
Callie Evans would rather hide out in her DJ sound booth than face the fact that she’s in love with her best friend, notorious campus hottie Tayber King.

Tayber turns hooking up into an art form–no drama, no commitment, no lies, and nobody gets hurt. Nobody but Callie, that is. When she sees an opportunity to explore his sexier side using a fake online profile, she grabs it. Now her uninhibited alter-ego ‘Sasha’ is steaming up the screen, and Callie is breaking all of Tayber’s rules.

As Callie and Tayber get closer, online and off, she knows she has to confess. And risk losing him forever.

**For mature readers, contains strong language and adult situations.**




Purchase:
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AUTHOR BIO
Shari Slade is a snarky optimist. A would-be academic with big dreams and very little means. When she isn't toiling away in the non-profit sector, she's writing gritty stories about identity and people who make terrible choices in the name of love (or lust). Somehow, it all works out in the end. If she had a patronus it would be a platypus.

Frequently found in a blanket fort, you can also find her contributing at Wonkomance, on twitterfacebook, or tumblr. For new release updates, sign up for the newsletter.







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Friday, March 28, 2014

Giveaway & Book Blitz: Upside Down (Off the Map #1) - Lia Riley



Upside Down by Lia Riley
(Off the Map #1)
Published by: Grand Central
Publication date: August 5th 2014
Genres: Contemporary, New Adult, Romance

Synopsis:
If You Never Get Lost, You’ll Never Be Found

Twenty-one-year-old Natalia Stolfi is saying goodbye to painful memories—and turning her life upside down with a trip to the land down under. For the next six months, she’ll pretend to be a carefree exchange student. Everything is going to plan until she meets a surly surfer with hypnotic green eyes, and the troubling ability to see straight through her act.

Bran Lockhart is having the worst year on record. After the girl of his dreams turned into a nightmare, he slunk back to Melbourne to piece his life together. Yet no amount of disappointment could blind him to the pretty California girl who gets past all his defenses. He’s never wanted anyone the way he wants Talia. A single semester abroad won’t  cover something this serious. But when Bran gets a stark reminder of why he stopped believing in love, he and Talia must decide if what they have is once-in-a-lifetime . . . or if there’s a plane to California with her name on it.



Purchase:



AUTHOR BIO
Lia Riley writes offbeat New Adult Romance. After studying at the University of Montana-Missoula, she scoured the world armed only with a backpack, overconfidence and a terrible sense of direction. She counts shooting vodka with a Ukranian mechanic in Antarctica, sipping yerba mate with gauchos in Chile and swilling fourex with stationhands in Outback Australia among her accomplishments.

A British literature fanatic at heart, Lia considers Mr. Darcy and Edward Rochester as her fictional boyfriends. Her very patient husband doesn't mind. Much. When not torturing heroes (because c'mon, who doesn't love a good tortured hero?), Lia herds unruly chickens, camps, beach combs, daydreams about as-of-yet unwritten books, wades through a mile-high TBR pile and schemes yet another trip. Right now, Icelandic hot springs and Scottish castles sound mighty fine.

She and her family live mostly in Northern California.

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Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Cover Reveal: Collide - Christine Fonseca



Collide by Christine Fonseca
Publication date: April 29th 2014
Genres: Thriller, Young Adult
Designed by Book Cover Machine

Synopsis:
The most dangerous secrets are the ones that kill.

When a surprising mental breakdown draws too much attention from a secret government group call the Order, 17-year-old Dakota discovers that her so-called boring life isn’t so boring after all. Between the lies, secrets and assassins out to kill her family, Dakota discovers there’s more to paranormal activity than ghosts and cheap mind tricks. Now she must uncover the truth before a new breed of terrorism takes everything away – including her life.


AUTHOR BIO
Critically acclaimed nonfiction and YA author Christine Fonseca is dedicated to helping children of all ages find their voice in the world. Drawing on her expertise as an educational psychologist, her nonfiction titles address issues of emotional intensity, resiliency and giftedness. In fiction, she explores the darker aspects of humanity and delivers gothic thrillers that take you on a rollercoaster ride of emotions. In life, she teaches her own children to embrace their unique talents and find their voice by being a force of positive change in the world.
When she’s not writing or developing programs to support children with exceptional needs, she can be found spending time with her family, sipping too many skinny vanilla lattes at her favorite coffee house or playing around on Facebook and Twitter. For more information about Christine Fonseca or her books, visit her website – http://christinefonseca.com or her blog http://christinefonseca.blogspot.com.

Author links: 




Book Blitz: Vivian's List - Haleigh Lovell



Vivian’s List by Haleigh Lovell
Publication date: October 4th 2013
Genres: New Adult, Romance

Synopsis:
A NEW YORK TIMES and USA TODAY Bestseller.

A New Adult Romance packed with Heat and Heart.
**On sale for 99 cents for a limited time

“One of my best reads of 2013.” ~ Inside The Pages of a Book
“If you want a hot steamy, touches your heart in all the right places read, look no further!” ~ Fab, Fun and Tantalizing Reads

Her brother’s best friend. A list. A love story.

After ending a horrible, scarring relationship, Vivian embraces her freedom by making a sexual bucket list. When her brother’s best friend, Liam, finds it, sparks fly and hearts open.

Can Vivian heal one steamy encounter at a time?

** This is book 1 in a two-part series
** New Adult Romance recommended for readers aged 18+ due to language and strong sexual content

The book is only 0.99c for a limited time only!




Purchase:





AUTHOR BIO
Haleigh received a B.A. in Journalism. Despite training as a journalist, Haleigh soon found she preferred making up her own stories--stories with heat and heart.

Author Links:

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Giveaway & Blog Tour: Butterfly - Elle Harper


Release date: January 15th 2014
Purchase: Amazon

Synopsis via Goodreads:
Grace Elliot is falling apart. Overwhelming tragedy has turned her world into a dark and lonely place. Facing the pain and the ghosts is impossible. Hiding her secret behind a mask of confidence and living a lie is the only thing she knows how to do. She’s alive…but not living.

Counsellor Ben Hardy is certain he can help Grace heal. Maybe it’s a way to rid himself of the demons haunting him from that one horrific night when his life shattered.

When they meet, everything changes, and their pasts offer them a remedy to save each other…until Ben's traumatic history threatens to destroy the trust they’ve built.

Will the truth tear them apart? Or will it force them to understand the healing power of forgiveness and love.


Review: 

My Rating:

4 Stars


Favorite Quotes:

"I'm holding two things in my hands right now.  Hell and hope.  It's up to me which one I choose to follow."
"You saved me, Ben, but I was blind to the fact you needed saving too.  I wish you could see yourself through my eyes, because you're worth the fight.  You just have to realize that yourself."
"You see, I know bad things happen.  Every day.  To good people.  It's called life.  The thing is, though, when you hit rock bottom, the only place left to go is up.  I'm starting to believe that good things, special things, can come from the bad, the horrific, and the ugly.  That a tragedy can be a gift in disguise, and has the ability to turn into something positive and life changing.  Something that will help others, if you let it.  That love can heal the pain and bring meaning back to life."  


My Review:

Although a work of fiction and a story of love and romance, this book is highly inspirational on overcoming trauma, and should be read as a primer not just for the victims of atrocities, but for their physical and mental-health professionals as well.  The advice given and the process of her recovery is presented in a believable and applicable manner, and could be utilized for a variety of traumas besides the rape and PTSD suffered by the character in this story. The book is well written, modern, topical, and realistic, I could feel their tension, confusion, and indecision; as well as their hope and relief as the slow process of understanding, self acceptance, and little by little - as those all important things know as forgiveness and healing - occurred.  And in the midst of all that, there is a tender and steamy love story evolving as well, thankfully.  I fell in love with Ben before Grace did, he is the ultimate boyfriend and almost too good to be true, although he has secrets too... 
Empress DJ


About the Author
Elle Harper is the pen name of Bestselling author Sibel Hodge. She is the Amazon Top 100 Bestselling Author of Fourteen Days Later and Be Careful What You Wish For. She has 8 cats and 1 husband. In her spare time, she's Wonder Woman! When she's not out saving the world from dastardly demons she writes an eclectic mix of romantic comedies, mysteries, thrillers, children's books, and non fiction.
www.sibelhodge.com | @sibelhodge



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Giveaway & Cover Reveal: At Any Turn - Brenna Aubrey



At Any Turn by Brenna Aubrey
(Gaming the System #2)
Publication date: April 15th 2014
Genres: Contemporary, New Adult, Romance

Designed by Okay Creations

Synopsis:
So You Want to Be a Hero?

Millionaire CEO Adam Drake overcame a tortured past to take control of his life and build his own gaming empire. The final piece falls into place with his newfound love for brilliant geek girl blogger, Mia Strong. Now Adam is at the top of his game.

Your Princess Is in Another Castle.

Until Mia suddenly breaks things off, leaving Adam in the dark. He senses she needs his help but that she's too stubborn or scared to ask. The more he tries to take control, the further she shies away. This is one problem he can’t solve by writing a check or a few clever lines of code.

He will have to dig deep and put himself at risk…or else risk losing her forever.

This New Adult contemporary romance is intended for readers over the age of 18 due to adult language, sexual content and adult situations.

AUTHOR BIO
Brenna Aubrey is an author of New Adult contemporary romance stories that center on geek culture. Her debut novel, At Any Price, released December, 2013.

She has always sought comfort in good books and the long, involved stories she weaves in her head. Brenna is a city girl with a nature-lover’s heart. She therefore finds herself out in green open spaces any chance she can get. A mommy to two little kids and teacher to many more older kids, she juggles schedules to find time to pursue her love of storycrafting.

She currently resides on the west coast with her husband, two children, two adorable golden retriever pups, two birds and some fish.

Brenna’s short story “The Love Letter” was the Grand Prize winner of the Jane Austen Made Me Do It Short Story Contest. As such, it was included in the anthology of the same name (Ballantine, 2011)

Author links: 

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Giveaway & Release Day Blitz: Twelve Steps - Veronica Bartles


Twelve Steps
by Veronica Bartles
Release Date: 03/25/14

Book Summary:
Sixteen-year-old Andi is tired of being a second-class sibling to perfect sister Laina. There in Laina's shadow, Andi's only noticeable feature is her pretty awesome hair. And even that is eclipsed by Laina's perfect everything else.

When Andi’s crush asks her to fix him up with Laina, Andi decides enough is enough and devises a twelve-step program to wrangle the spotlight away from Laina. After all, great hair must count for something.

Step 1: Admit she’s powerless to change her perfect sister, and accept that her life really, really sucks. OK, maybe that's two steps in one.

Step 4: Make a list of her good qualities besides great hair. There have got to be at least three good qualities, right?

Step 7: Demand attention for more than just her shortcomings, and break out of her shell. Easier said that done, but worth the effort in the long-run. 

When a stolen kiss from her crush ends in disaster, Andi finds that her prince isn’t as charming as she'd hoped, and realizes she may need a new program--perhaps with less steps!

As cracks in Laina’s flawless fa├žade begin to show, the sisters work together to find a spotlight big enough for both to shine.

About the Author
As the second of eight children and the mother of four, Veronica Bartles is no stranger to the ups and downs of sibling relationships. (She was sandwiched between the gorgeous-and-insanely-popular older sister and the too-adorable-for-words younger sister.) She uses this insight to write stories about siblings who mostly love each other, even while they’re driving one another crazy.   When she isn’t writing or getting lost in the pages of her newest favorite book, Veronica enjoys knitting fabulous bags and jewelry out of recycled plastic bags and old VHS tapes, sky diving (though she hasn’t actually tried that yet), and inventing the world’s most delectable cookie recipes.  TWELVE STEPS is Veronica Bartles's first novel.

Author Links:
 photo iconwebsite-32x32_zps1f477f69.png   photo iconfacebook-32x32_zps64a79d4a.png

***GIVEAWAY***
1 ebook of Twelve Steps & $10 Amazon gift card (INT)
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Friday, March 21, 2014

Giveaway & Book Blitz: Perfectly Broken - Prescott Lane



Perfectly Broken by Prescott Lane
Publication date: March 2014
Genres: Adult, Contemporary, Romance

Synopsis:
Even after years of trauma therapy, Peyton still believes she’s broken.  She has little desire to date or show off her natural beauty, content simply to hang out with her best friends and run her pie shop in New Orleans.  But her world turns upside-down when a handsome architect and self-confessed player shows up in her shop and thinks she’s perfect, much more than the usual hook-up.  While Peyton does her best to resist his charms, believing she could never be enough for him, she can’t deny the obvious heat between them.

With Reed determined to have her, Peyton must decide whether to continue to hide behind her apron and baggy clothes or take a chance and share her scars with Reed, a man with a playboy reputation and scars of his own — a dark past he can’t possibly share with Peyton, not after learning the horrors she’s endured.  But if they can find a way to trust each other, and themselves, they just might be able to heal, to save each other, to live perfectly broken together.




Purchase:


AUTHOR BIO
Prescott Lane is originally from Little Rock, Arkansas, and graduated from Centenary College in 1997 with a degree in sociology. She went on to Tulane University to receive her MSW in 1998, after which she worked with developmentally delayed and disabled children. She currently resides in New Orleans with her husband and two children.





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Giveaway & Book Blitz: The Boyfriend List - Renee Novelle



The Boyfriend List by R.S. Novelle
Publication date: February 10th 2014
Genres: New Adult, Romance

Synopsis:
The Boyfriend List follows twenty-year-old Reagan in her quest for the perfect relationship after a somewhat tragic spring break breakup leaves her disillusioned about love… again.

Reagan had always prided herself on making levelheaded, practical, analytical decisions about everything. Everything, that is, except where guys are concerned. Which was proven to her, once again, when her “boyfriend” opts to take another girl on their oh-so-romantic trip to his lake house. In order to prevent future heartbreak, she creates a checklist of all the qualities she wants in a man, and vows not to give her heart away again until she can determine if they fit every last criteria.

After scouring campus with her two best friends in her tricky journey, her detective work returns a pile of unworthy rejects, and it seems as though her choices are narrowed down to only two options: the hot stranger who’s inspired her new project, and her best guy friend Ian, who she’s always kept at bay due to his perceived playboy reputation.

Reagan gets more than she bargained for with her new set of rules, however, and is surprised to find that love, and the perfect boyfriend, may have been within reach the entire time. But will Ian’s reputation ruin his chances to prove his worth? And can Reagan let go of her insecurities long enough to even give him a chance?

The Boyfriend List is a light, New Adult romance about friendship, trust, and learning to let go in order to embrace what real love can offer.



Purchase:


AUTHOR BIO
Renee’ Novelle is Preceded by a long line of published family members, including Pulitzer Prize nominated author and Poet Laureate of Kentucky Jesse Stuart.

As a child, Novelle was already gaining recognition for several of her works, and in her formative years, she continued this trend by earning local awards for her short stories and poems.

Inspired to cultivate her talent, Novelle pursued freelance journalism and has found placement of 75 of her pieces in both online and print publications since 2008. Additionally, she has written multiple screenplays, and contributed her savvy, effective writing style to many non-profit and for profit organizations. She launched several blogs over the years, which garnered international attention.

In 2013, Novelle returned to her first love – fiction. She writes psychological and paranormal thrillers, as well as contemporary fiction and new adult fiction. For a complete schedule of upcoming releases, please visit www.RSNovelle.com

Though she received her Bachelor’s of Science in Communication, Summa Cum Laude, she considers herself a constant student of the written word. She’s an avid reader, an enthusiastic quote poster, and rarely takes “no” as a final answer. She has an unhealthy obsession for theater, dance, music and art, and strongly believes that wine is simultaneously the beginning of, and resolution to, all of life’s problems. She believes in following dreams, and that in the end, you always end up where you're meant to be.

Author links:







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Thursday, March 20, 2014

Cover Reveal: A Beautiful Rock - Lilliana Anderson


A Beautiful Rock by Lilliana Anderson
(Beautiful #4)
Publication date: April 3rd 2014
Genres: New Adult, Romance

Synopsis:
***CONTENT WARNING*** New Adult Romance for ages 18+ due to sex scenes and adult situations.

After the video of his public outburst catapulted him to superstardom, Marcus now has everything he ever wanted.

Or so he thought. Be careful what you wish for, his mother always told him…

After spending two years touring the globe, he’s growing tired, and that endless line of women has become a sea of blurry and meaningless faces.

When he returns home and receives a visit from Naomi, his previous object of affection, he finally starts to look at himself and what he’s become. He doesn’t like it.

Something has to change…

On the surface, Lisa is a pretty simple girl. She goes to work, spends time with her friends, and adores her dog, Perry. She loves the quiet life and isn’t interested in the bright lights of Marcus’s world. So when he takes an interest in her, she makes it very clear that she doesn’t want what he’s offering. You see, Lisa has secrets, and being seen with Marcus will be the key to her undoing.

Being a man used to getting what he wants, Marcus won’t be taking no for an answer. For the first time, he has met someone who he feels a definite connection with, and he won’t be taking no for an answer – even if it means inadvertently ruining everything Lisa has worked so hard to conceal…

Will Marcus and Lisa find a way to deal with her secrets and be together? Or will she push him away, ensuring Marcus is destined to always have his affections unreturned?


AUTHOR BIO
Australian born and bred, Lilliana Anderson has always loved to read and write considering it the best form of escapism that the world has to offer. Besides writing Angelien's biographical trilogy, she also writes contemporary romance and drama all based around Aussie characters.

When she isn't writing she is a wife, and a mother to four children. She has worked in a variety of industries and studied humanities before transferring to commerce/law at university.

She currently lives a fairly quiet life in suburban Melbourne.

Author links: 

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Cover Reveal: Timespell: Perilous Waters - Diana Paz


Timespell: Perilous Waters by Diana Paz
(Timespell #2)
Publication date: May 15th 2014
Genres: Science Fiction, Time-Travel, Young Adult

Synopsis:
After nearly losing their lives defeating the creatures of Mythos in Revolutionary France, Julia and Kaitlyn finally understand what Angie has known all along… being a Daughter of Fate isn’t so fun when one mistake can mean their deaths. Haunted by visions and horror-filled memories, the girls have spent the summer honing their newly discovered magical abilities, determined to grow in power and prepare for the uncertain time when the Fates summon them to their next mission.

But their protector Ethan, still embittered by Julia’s betrayal, refuses to engage in the girls’ magical research or power-enhancing spell practice. That is, until his brother’s loyalty to Julia causes him to unwittingly uncover ancient magic greater and more binding than any force the girls have encountered so far. Before the girls or Ethan grasp the full extent of what his brother has done, the girls are jettisoned through time into the madness of the Caribbean during the golden age of piracy.

Only by working together can the girls harness the full power of their magic and secure the world timeline, but with the lives of those close to Angie and Julia at risk, and Kaitlyn designing a dark agenda of her own, all three girls harbor secrets that threaten to drive their fledgling trinity apart. Small treacheries, mounting fear, and the use of dark magic have not gone unnoticed by those trapped within the Nether… those who would stop at nothing to unleash their destruction upon the world once more.

AUTHOR BIO
Diana Paz writes books about magic, adventure, and romance. She was born in Costa Rica, grew up on Miami Beach, moved to Los Angeles in high school, and went to college in San Diego. Basically, she’s a beach bum. Diana graduated from California State University, San Marcos with a Bachelor’s Degree in Liberal Arts. She loves old movies, epic fantasy, all kinds of music, and heading to the beach with a good book. Preferably sipping a highly sweetened iced coffee. Find her at her blog:dianapazwrites.blogspot.com or on Twitter @dianapazwrites

Author links:

Giveaway & Book Blitz: Bound By Lies - Hanna Peach



Bound by Lies by Hanna Peach
(Bound #1)
Publication date: January 21st 2014
Genres: Adult, Romance, Suspense
Length: 90,000 words

Synopsis:
Our love is on his terms. He contacts me only through notes − unpredictable and untraceable. When we meet, he can touch me, but I’m not allowed to touch him. When we make love, it’s only after I have been bound and blindfolded. It’s the only time I truly feel alive. Which is why I play along with it. For now.

Caden Thaine is the most sinfully beautiful man I have ever seen. But more than that, his touch sets me on fire. And dear God, do I ache for him. I don’t know where he lives or even what he does. But this doesn’t scare me. My only fear is that one day his messages will stop. I know he’s hiding something. But that’s okay. I am hiding things, too. Like my real name and... who I really am. But the deeper I fall for him, the stronger my curiosity grows.

I could never have imagined just how much our lives are bound. And that pulling at his tangled web of secrets would cause my own dark past to come back to try and reclaim me. Will we survive? Will our love?

Adult romantic suspense. +18 years.



Purchase:


AUTHOR BIO
Hanna began to write at the tender age of seven, starting with a daring and questionable autobiography entitled Go Suck a Lemon. Perhaps it was a little before its time.
After leaving school she agreed with everyone who said she needed to get a degree and a real job to become a proper adult. She kept writing as a hobby. After starting (and never finishing) several degrees and switching from multiple careers, she finally decided that being a real adult was overrated. In 2012, she sold everything, moved to Europe and began to write full-time.
Eternally restless, Hanna has lived in Indonesia, Australia, Germany and Scotland. She is currently residing in England.
She is addicted to coffee and chocolate and would one day like to own a dragon.
Hanna Peach is the author of the Dark Angel urban fantasy series and Bound romantic suspense series. Angelblood (Dark Angel #4) and Bound by Fear (Bound #2) are due for publication in 2014.

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Cover Reveal: Almost Too Far (Almost Bad Boy Series #3) - A.O. Peart

Almost Too Far Cover
add-to-goodreads-button31
Synopsis
A martini glass of sizzling romance, a jigger of suspense and crime, perfectly shaken with a twist of wacky humor. 
Where would you draw the line between love and trust?

When Colin’s feisty great grandma Helga mysteriously disappears, Natalie
and the gun-toting Svetlana rush to the rescue. With the help of Russian
mafia goons and Natalie’s girlfriends, they get more than they bargained for.
Natalie invites trouble into her life all over again. She could find herself
questioned by the police, or worse, her relationship with Colin could become
rickety once more.

And so the race begins: with grandma Helga on the loose, Colin turns to the
police for help, and Natalie is a stiletto heel tip outside of the law. But being
in the wrong has never felt so vindicated.
********************************************************  Disclaimer
**Warning: due to sexual situations, nasty language, and a high dose of
sarcasm this book may not be appropriate for readers under 18 years
old.  Not intended for prudes who get easily affronted**
Excerpt
Almost Bad Boy Teaser 2
MeetTheAuthor
A.O. Peart Author Pic
I was born and raised in Poland. When I was just seven-years-old I decided to learn English, because I wanted to translate my favorite Polish fairytales.
I write in multiple genres, including paranormal, fantasy, urban fiction, sci-fi, contemporary, and short stories. I am a member of Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators, Western Washington Chapter, author critique group, Writers In the Rain, and several authors’ and readers’ networking groups on Linkedin, Facebook, and Goodreads. 
I love reading good books almost as much as writing them. I describe myself as “European born, American by choice”. I can never decide which season I prefer—summer or fall. I speak with Polish accent and love listening to the Southern drawl. I am passionate about watercolor painting, fashion—especially stilettos, rock climbing, environment, and organic food and gardening. I live in the Seattle area with my family and a chronically curious cat, Cinnamon.
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Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Must Love Otters by Eliza Gordon

Must Love Otters
Book: Must Love Otters

Author: Eliza Gordon

Genre: Women's Fiction, Contemporary Romance, Chick-Lit

Book Synopsis:

Hollie Porter is the chairwoman of Generation Disillusioned: at twenty-five years old, she’s saddled with a job she hates, a boyfriend who’s all wrong for her, and a vexing inability to say no. She’s already near her breaking point, so when one caller too many kicks the bucket during Hollie’s 911 shift, she cashes in the Sweethearts’ Spa & Stay gift certificate from her dad and heads to Revelation Cove, British Columbia. One caveat: she’s going solo. Any sweethearts will have to be found on site.

Hollie hopes to find her beloved otters in the wilds of the Great White North, but instead she’s providing comic relief for staff and guests alike. Even Concierge Ryan, a former NHL star with bad knees and broken dreams, can’t stop her from stumbling from one (mis)adventure to another. Just when Hollie starts to think that a change of venue doesn’t mean a change in circumstances, the island works its charm and she starts to think she might have found the rejuvenation she so desperately desires. But then an uninvited guest crashes the party, forcing her to step out of the discomfort zone where she dwells and save the day … and maybe even herself in the process.


My Rating

5 - Tears in my eyes from laughing aloud- Stars!  

Favorite Quotes:

“Self-pity is a fickle cow.  She makes you feel worse about feeling worse.”

“Dinner on a date is about so much more than a satisfying meal.  One has to consider a number of factors: too much onion or garlic?  Bad for kissing.  Too much greenery or carbs?  Fodder for the fart factory.  Too spicy?  Could be looking at embarrassing bowel upset.  I also avoid green tea and anything caramel.  Both have resulted in disastrous ends to first dates when my stomach decided that such ingredients are offensive and should be expelled through the lower route immediately, without delay.  Nothing says romance like taking an explosive shit in some stranger’s bathroom.”

“I am glad to see him go, even though I notice - again - how nicely his slacks fit him.  But it doesn’t matter.  He’s an obnoxious mongrel who wouldn’t know how to treat a woman if she gave him an instruction manual with an audiobook and full-color illustrations.  He has to be a total lost cause if he’s still single - he’s gotta be pushing thirty - and living this far from civilization?  He’s probably doing womankind a favor keeping himself out of circulation.”


My Review:

This book is wicked funny!  By page 2 I knew I had found my new favorite author.  Actually, I had an inkling before I even started reading… with the bold heading for Chapter One “Batman Jerry,”… I was already had.  Starting a book with loving otters in the title that contained a first chapter about “Batman Jerry,” well, I could already sense I was going to enjoy the ride.  I must admit – I truly love and adore a clever and snarky heroine who is not afraid to call herself out for being an asshat …you see, I know the type… I personally should be looking for a 12 step program to join.

But I don’t want to give you the impression that this story is all sniggers and giggles.  The whole range of emotions is tapped here.  Many tears. Humiliations.  Betrayals.  Accidents.  And really bad news for Batman Jerry.  Our intrepid heroine, who proves to be more than a bit of a Calamity Jane, has hit a rough patch in her life.  She has finally reached the tipping point of having enough misfortune hit the fan at once, to rouse her from her complacency and bring her to the realization that she is unhappy with her awful job, jackass boyfriend, meager lifestyle, horrid co-workers, distant best-friend, yada yada… and that she deserves more than what she has settled for.  She also knows that she is a large part of the problem and feels… empty and incomplete. Most of us have been there to some extent.  And like most of us when reaching these life-changing epiphanies, she is at a total loss as to what to do about it.  


I instantly liked the title upon first glance as - who doesn’t love otters? They are cute, frisky, and full of funny antics.  It was finding out late in the book why she is so drawn to the otters that squeezed my heart.  As humorous, well written, wily, and brilliantly clever as this story is, there are several points in the book that brought me to a full stop with a, “Wow!  That just got real!” It turns on a dime and runs a crocked obstacle course.  I loved it!  I am still raving about it nearly a week later.  I find I am unwilling to start another book just yet as I am wanting to savor it just a little longer.  Actually, since learning some juicy stuff near the end, I am having a hard time resisting the urge to have the full-on otter experience all over again.  I have a really good feeling that I will enjoy Hollie Porter’s story even more the second time around.  

Empress DJ