Monday, October 10, 2016

Book Review: Until We Collide by Charlotte Fallowfield


Until We Collide

by Charlotte Fallowfield

 

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"This is Brit rom-com at its finest. Fans of Bridget Jones will love this." - TotallyBooked Blog

An Amazon UK and international bestselling romantic comedy novel.

What do you do when the guy you’re in love with is seeing someone else?

That’s the dilemma facing Paige Taylor. All of her life she’s only ever had eyes for the gorgeous Alec Wright, but despite their undeniable chemistry, their timing has always been off. Fast approaching her thirtieth birthday, Paige despairs of ever finding love and a happy ever after. Her best friend Poppie tells her that she can either watch life pass her by, or grab it with both hands. She convinces Paige to throw herself back into the dating pool, or she could be waiting for Alec forever.

What Paige didn’t expect was the catalogue of dating disasters to follow. A neck brace, jelly fish, stitches, flashing and an encounter with a gorilla were some of the most memorable. Despite some downright hilarious, humiliating and cringe-worthy dates, her biological clock is ticking and Paige is determined to keep trying until she finds the one.

Was Alec Wright always her Mr. Right, or is he still out there waiting to be found?

Join Paige in her quest to find the ultimate prize. Love.

Charlotte Fallowfield's alter-ego, C.J. Fallowfield, is an Amazon #1 bestselling author of humorous erotic romance novels.


My Rating:



Favorite Quotes:



My mouth went dry as I tried to remember all of Poppie’s tips for kissing over the years. She told me no guy wanted a girl with a mouth as wide as a guppy, who sucked his tongue with the force of a Dyson vacuum cleaner first time, or licked him to death like an overeager puppy. She’d told me to just purse my lips and let him lead and take control. Don’t slobber, don’t slobber, don’t slobber, I chanted to myself as he got closer and closer.  Not that it would be an issue, as right now my mouth was drier than a centenarian nun’s vagina.


I did a most unladylike snort of amusement, forgetting I had a mouthful of water, and ended up spraying him when I choked on it and two jets shot out of my nostrils as well as a geyser-like torrent from my lips.

 

His name’s Toby and he’s really nice.  It’s been almost a year.  It’s serious, I think.  I mean, we’re having sex you know, sex is serious.  God, now that sounds like he’s a total bore in the bedroom, or that I am.  He’s not.  I’m not.  I’m a hellcat when I get going, a real tigress.  My God, what am I saying?


How many times have you laughed at me and my calamities?  This is total karma, it’s so nice not to be the clumsy one for once, but next time you suggest a revenge style undercover mission, count me out.  You’re more Mr. Bean than Tom Cruise.


The way we kiss?  The way my skin vibrates whenever you’re near, the way my heart pounds so hard I think I might die, the way I can’t breathe whenever I look at you?  There’s no way we’re not compatible, but I promise you we’ll get plenty of practice in before the day, just to be sure…



My Review:



I frequently giggled as I read, but more than once, I also laughed so hard I had to stop reading to catch my breath. This was a fun and bright and shiny story.  The writing was brilliantly funny, highly engaging, and unfailingly entertaining.  Paige was an adorable klutz who was prone to hilarious filterless rambling when flustered.  She also appeared to be doomed to experience one dating disaster after another, as she seemed to be a magnet for “arseholes, freaks, and perverts.”  I cherished her as well as her friendship with Poppie; only the best type of friend would help you get even with a cheating ex by (among other things) putting itching powder in his briefs, allergens on his bed sheets, and fish in his curtains.  Their antics and mortifying misadventures were extremely amusing and creative.  Ms. Fallowfield’s characters were fresh, intriguing, alluring, and quirky.  I enjoyed this book from beginning to end and although I loved the conclusion, I mourned the loss of finishing as I could keep reading Paige and Alec’s story into infinity.


Empress DJ


About the Author


Charlotte Fallowfield is an Amazon UK and international bestselling author of sweet, and sex free, romantic comedy novels. She comes from the United Kingdom and is half-French. She lives in the wonderful countryside of Wales, surrounded by rolling hills, trees, and fields full of sheep and cows. She is yet to find her Prince Charming, but lives with her extremely pampered fur baby, Pumpkin, kitten of mass destruction.

Her alter-ego, C.J. Fallowfield is an Amazon #1 UK and international bestselling author of contemporary humorous erotic romance novels.
Sign up for her newsletters to be kept up to date on her frequent promotions and giveaways, as well as to get exclusive first looks at covers, teasers, excerpts and her latest releases:
www.cjfallowfield.co.uk
www.charlottefallowfield.co.uk

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